The Evolution of a Map

Early on in my writing of "The Light of Epertase: Legends Reborn," I was getting lost in the world. No, I mean actually getting lost. Epertase, and the smaller countries surrounding it, became too big in my mind to keep track of. And if it had become too big and complicated for me, imagine how my poor proofreaders felt. Every one of them commented on how much easier it would be to read the book if there was a map. This is a common need in fantasy novels, BTW.

Well, easy for my proofreaders to say, but what if you don't have the talent or software to create a map? That is where I was. So, I sat down with Microsoft Paint and created this gem. Hey, it worked for what I needed so stop laughing. I kept a printed copy next to my desk for my next edit and fixed whatever minor errors I came across.



Then I received a book deal from Rhemalda Publishing. (Actually, there is a lot that happened in between but I won't bore you with all of that. You know, querying, rewrites, etc.)

During the publishing stages, Rhemalda asked if I had any maps to give them as a guide for their map work. I cringed at the idea of showing this to Rhemalda president and super genius cartographer (I just learned that word), Rhett Hoffmeister.

Before I sent my map, I warned him 17 times about how bad it was but he assured me, "No worries." Easy for him to say; I was the one who was about to show the president of my new publisher that I wasn't as talented as he may have initially thought.

With much trepidation, I sent him my craptography. We discussed all of the details, including the direction my rivers needed to flow (which required a minor edit in one of my scenes), the need for connecting roads from town to town, and other important cartography stuff. (I love that word.)

So here is what Rhett came up with. I added the brownish paper background for effect though what you see in the book will be black-and-white. I can see a little difference, how 'bout you?



Pretty cool, huh?

BTW, please, no requests for me to do the map for your book. I think one masterpiece is enough.

A Day of Training

As a lieutenant, one of my responsibilities is helping train the firefighters in my charge. For a guy who doesn't particularly enjoy speaking in front of people, this prospect isn't a welcomed one. When my chief asked me the other day to train everyone in our battalion, of course, I immediately said "no." Actually, it sounded more like, "Whatever you need, chief," but you get the point.

In the fire service there is a series of trainings that we call, "Save Your Own” training. Basically, these lessons are exactly what the title says. Over the years firefighters have found we spend most of our time training on how to save you, the public, from whatever hazard you may find yourself in. That's great, that's what we're expected to do, but we were neglecting ourselves in the process. If one of us becomes trapped while looking for you, then who will save you?

It makes perfect sense if you think about it. With firefighters in the most hazardous conditions you can imagine, think about how much harder it would be to get one of our members out of our predicament. After all, that member was where he or she was because it was dangerous. Now, add 70-100 pounds of equipment and you see how impossible it can become.

Trainings have been developed over the last 20 years or so in an effort to teach us how to get ourselves or our brethren out of precarious situations… Like bailing out of an upper floor window without falling to our deaths if the room suddenly engulfs us in flames. Or how to best carry a fellow firefighter down a ladder if they become unconscious. That might sound easy at first but let me tell you, the simple act of getting an unconscious firefighter (complete with their gear and heavy SCBA) just from the floor to the window sill with fire licking at our necks, well that's enough of a challenge. Add that we still have to get them down a ladder and you begin to understand the difficulty. But there are techniques that can make this task a tad smoother though no less labor intensive. And that's what we work on.

In years past, it was in these life-or-death situations that the firefighters on the scene began thinking about how to best accomplish their rescue. By that point, thinking was too late. So you see the importance of preparing for the what-if’s?

The training I had to simulate this week involved a firefighter with zero visibility getting lost in a warehouse full of smoke (hence the zero visibility). To make this more difficult, we bled the air in his or her air tank down to 1000PSI (about 5-10 minutes depending on the individual's ability to remain calm and his or her own fitness levels). The reason we drain the air supply is to simulate a firefighter who had been working hard previous to becoming lost. We cover the individual's mask so he/she is completely blind. Then, one at a time, we lead the firefighter into the simulated warehouse and get him or her "lost."

The idea of this exercise is to test a firefighter's abilities to call for help, locate the hoseline he or she was using before becoming lost, and get out before that firefighter "dies."

Here is a sobering stat from the exercise. Out of the 26 experienced firefighters who attempted this training, around ten of them ran out of air before they escaped. They essentially "died."

There were a number of factors that contributed to these results. Though we created the exercise so every firefighter would find the hoseline right away, they needed to recognize when they came to a coupling (where two sections of hose join together) and how to tell by gloved feel only which way leads to the truck and freedom and which way leads to the nozzle. It is not a guess, there is a way, but it can be tricky to remember when the something hits the fan. It's a boring technique so I won't go into it here.

Some of the firefighters found the coupling, misread it, and went deeper into the warehouse. By the time they reached the nozzle, they had 200' feet of hose behind them to navigate along in the other direction to escape. A lot of precious air had been used to get to that point. Other members were on their way out when the hose did a circle and crossed itself beneath debris and the firefighter accidentally followed the hoseline in the direction from which they had just come. Trust me, it is easy to do.

Out of the 26 firefighters, one firefighter's microphone on his radio broke and, by no fault of his own, he was unable to call for help. Mind you, he called for help as he had no idea his words weren't going anywhere, but no one would have heard him. Imagine being in your last chance at life and an equipment failure prevents anyone from knowing until it's too late.
There were other minor errors here and there, which is to be expected in such hazardous conditions, but overall the firefighters did a great job. The members who didn't make it out never stopped trying. Even in training, there is a moment when every firefighter, exhausted and sucking that last breath of survivable air, has to decide whether to give up on the training or fight until they are told it is over. It is easy to say, "I quit. I guess I didn't make it." But if you quit now, what happens when it is for real? These guys and gals didn't give up. And I think they learned something. For that I am elated with how the training went.
These deadly situations happen around the country all of the time. You just don't hear about them unless they happens in your community. This training was developed because this exact scenario has happened many times over the years. It'll likely happen again. Here's a boring nugget for you. Firefighters die in commercial structures 4 times more often per incident than in occupied residential structures.

So, hopefully, the firefighters were able to take something away from this training that could help them if, God forbid, they ever find themselves in such a situation. And, hopefully, by reading this, you have a little better understanding of what it's like to be a firefighter.
Even when we're not fighting fires.

I promise to try and crack a joke or two in my next blog to make it more bearable.

Thanks for reading.

ARC copies

My First and Only Stab at Poetry... Urgh!

OK. Let me begin by saying I am not one for poetry. I understand poetry can be beautiful and that it is a skill to be able to do it well but I just don't get it. In saying this, I'm going to show you the extent of my poetry career.

In 1991, I was beginning the 12th grade and my English teacher gave us an assignment to write a poem in Emily Dickenson's style. The following is what I came up with as it was printed in the local newspaper. My mom kept this for all of these years. If I were to be honest with you, I'd tell you I don't even remember writing this let alone having it published in the paper. I imagine if I did remember this, I'd also remember my macho guy friends beating me up for it as well. But, alas, here it is. I don't know if this poem is good or embarrassing or what but I figured I'd put it out there for you all to decide. Please, be gentle.

"Your Name as a character" contest (Plus some other loot.)

Well, the title says it all. I am holding a contest in which the winner will name a character in my next published novel. Just imagine, if you win you will have a character named after your child, you, your best friend, whoever you choose, forever. It doesn't matter to me who you pick.

When I say naming a character after you, I'm not talking about a character in a bar who says, "Good morning," to the hero as he passes by either. This character's name will be mentioned several times in more than one chapter.

But wait, there's more. How can I make this contest even better? (Imagine my sparkling smile and cheap suit like an infomercial host.) Well, how about if the winner of this contest also wins one of every prize that I offer from now until the release? That's right, win this contest and you automatically win every contest prize from now until launch. If I offer a poster as a future prize, the winner of this contest receives one as well as the main winner. If I give away a signed copy of the book, yep, you guessed it, you will win one too. Bookmarks? Sure thing. (Giveaways by Rhemalda, Goodreads, or any other entity different from www.epertase.blogspot.com not included.)

So how do you win this awesome prize? It's easy but it does take something from you. My fantasy novel, "The Light of Epertase: Legends Reborn," is set to release on August 1, 2011. Here's all you have to do. First, pre-order my novel anytime before its release. (You were going to buy it anyway, right?) I've even included a few links to make it easier for you. (Amazon, Barnesandnoble, Rhemalda) Next, email me a copy of the order receipt before August 1st at epertase@gmail.com.

Upon my receiving your verification of order, you will be entered into the contest. That's it; that's all you have to do.

"Now wait a minute," you might say. "What if I've already ordered your book, Doug?"

Well it wouldn't be fair if I didn't include you, would it? So, if you've already ordered, send me a copy of the receipt or order verification page and you're in.

Throughout the lead-up to my release, I'll have other contests but this will be the only one that you will be required to buy anything. But then, what could be a better prize than this?

Free gift for a little sharing

Now, on top of this wonderful contest, I want to give away free stuff and I want it to be easy to get. A lot of my contests will be announced on Facebook along with my blog and Twitter, so friend me (Facebook, Twitter) or follow my blog (www.epertase.blogspot.com) to be sure to hear about them.

In fact, I want to give something away right now. For the first 100 people who share this contest announcement on Facebook, or Twitter, or your own blog, I'll send you a signed, limited edition bookmark. There will only be 500 of this particular bookmark in total.

I will give the rest of these bookmarks out periodically until they are gone. After these 500 are gone, I will destroy the template and it won't be available again. As I said, this bookmark will be signed and numbered.

So that's it. No contest. Everyone's a winner. All I ask is if you share this blog for me, send me a message or email and include where you shared it and your address so I can get the bookmark sent to you. (I'll send out the bookmarks throughout the month of May.) That's it. Share and win. Everybody loves sharing, right? Just remember, you have to let me know where you shared the link in case I miss seeing it along with your address. Epertase@gmail.com

To recap. 1.) Be one of the first 100 people to share this link: win a limited-edition, signed bookmark. 2.)Pre-order my book and send me the proof: entered to win a bunch of swag and name a character in my next published novel.

So, there you have it. My first-ever contest. What do you think? Worth entering?

Good luck.

Now the fine print. Relax, nothing major.

1.) Stipulations for "Your Name as a Character" contest. Upon being notified of winning (contest will be announced during the launch week of August 1st, 2011) you will need to submit the names of three people (first and middle of each person on your list) in the order of preference. The reason for this is that my next published work is likely to be "The Light of Epertase, Book Two: A Kingdom's Fall." I have to have a little leeway in regards to names because the world is a fantasy world. In other words, Fred might not work. I may need to use a variation of Fred or his middle name. Frederick, for instance, might work better for my world. If I've tried everything and can't come up with something that works in my world, I'd go to your second choice. Now understand, I will do everything in my power to make the first name on your list work. I will contact you and we will go over this together so we are both happy and satisfied.

2.) Unfortunately, family members are excluded but, hey, you're probably in one of my books already.

3.) Due to shipping costs, "Sharing the link Bookmarks" giveaway is only valid in Canada and the US. I'm sorry everyone else.

4.) Winner of "Your name as a character" contest will be by a random drawing.

What's All This Collective Bargaining Noise?

If you've followed my blog then you know I write about being a firefighter quite a lot. I have never used this blog for political reasons, and don’t intend to make a habit of it, but this topic is an exception and I feel I must address the issues.

In the news lately, you may have heard some talk about collective bargaining and binding arbitration and other lawyer-sounding blah, blah, blah. As a firefighter I thought I'd give you a small taste of my feelings on the matter.

Hey, no dozing off. I'll try to keep this as interesting as I can.

First the boring part. (No jokes about how all of my blogs are boring, either.) Collective bargaining is how local governments negotiate with their public employees. It provides a set of rules to level the playing field between the bosses and the employees. If a fair deal cannot be agreed upon between the two parties, the contract goes to an arbitrator who looks at similar-sized communities (along with a bunch of other factors) and rules on what he/she believes is fair. Sometimes the bosses get what they want and sometimes the employees do. The arbitrator’s decision becomes the contract, hence binding arbitration. Whew. That was rough. So now here's my unbiased, wink, wink, take on what's currently going on.

If the politicians take collective bargaining from us, you can imagine what happens to our rights when it comes to negotiating. And this isn't about pay or benefits, either. Sure, those issues will be affected, but this has more to do with safety. A lot of people don't realize that equipment, staffing, ect. are covered in our contract negotiations. Here is a likely scenario of a future negotiation.

Boss: "Hey, (insert public employee name here). We found firefighter turnout gear that is much cheaper than the stuff you're wearing."

Public employee: "But, sir/ma'am. That gear isn't as good as what we have. We will be in greater danger if we use that. Can't we compromise?"

Imagine evil laughter.

Now we're in a sticky spot.

At least the budget will be fixed. Right?

Oh, shoot. That really isn't true, either. Tough economic times call for everyone to cut back, I get it. This plan doesn't do that. The politicians will still overspend, they will simply make us pay for it. Kind of like not buying your kid as good of a car seat so you can get that nice new high-speed rail. This attack on unions is just that--an attack on unions.

Let's look at Wall Street as an example. When a company's revenue goes down, let's just say hypothetically due to a poor economy, how do CEOs keep afloat? They probably take pay cuts and hold off on spending more money until things get better, right?

No? They layoff workers. Or buy cheaper parts. Did you know 2x4 lumber is really 1 ¾ x 3 ½?

I'm a firefighter. I'm not rich. I make more money than some and less money than others. Collective bargaining came around about thirty years ago. Firefighters rose from lower middle class to where we are now as a result. If you were running a city, you wouldn't like that too much, I don't imagine. If you could pay someone pennies to do a job, why would you pay them more?

Over the last few years, Wall Street and banking CEOs destroyed our country through their greed and lack of fiscal responsibility by causing the greatest economic downturn since the depression. This hurt everyone. To fix this, few CEO's if any have gone to jail or helped turn around the economy. They're not even hiring people because of fear of another crash. The people in power can't take the money from the poor since the poor don't have much to take. They won't take it from the rich, so that leaves the continuously diminishing middle class once again.

This isn't firefighters looking for extravagant paydays while watching the country crumble around them. Hell, Columbus firefighters deferred their last raise to help the city get through the hard times. Money isn't as important as getting a fair shake at the table.

I'd like to add something personal here. Sometimes at night while I'm in the fire house getting ready to lie down, I think about my family. Actually, I take that back. I think about my family every night. But some nights I think about my co-workers having to tell my wife and son that I'm not coming home. That's a pretty heavy weight but it is my cross to bear. I, along with firefighters and law enforcement personnel around the country, do that for the citizens paying our salary every day.

When the government tells you we are costing too much, ask yourself, "How many rich teachers do you know? Or firefighters? Or cops?"

Let me ask you this. Do any of you believe the teachers, firefighters, cops, etc. bankrupted this country with secret plans of world domination? Some people do. OK, not the world domination part, I threw that in. If you look at the grand scheme of things, the money saved from cutting our legs out from under us, even if the governments drastically cut our pay and benefits, would barely dent the deficit. Actually, dent is too big of a word for what it would do. This is a coordinated plan to break the last strong unions in the country. It's happening in Wisconsin, it's happening in Ohio, and it'll happen where you live soon.

Do you want the teacher teaching your kids or the police officers and firefighters saving your lives to be the lowest bid price? There is a saying, "You get what you pay for."

Let me leave you with a joke I read on Facebook the other day. I don't know who came up with it but it wasn't me. A CEO, teabagger, and union worker are sitting around a table that has a dozen cookies on it. The CEO takes eleven of the cookies, turns to the teabagger, and says, "Watch that union guy closely. He's going to try to take some of your cookie."

We don't want much of that cookie, just enough to keep us and you safe.

We are held to a higher standard for a reason. We have good jobs. But we're not stealing your money. The government should look elsewhere to find where it went.

Your History

I cringe just thinking about this blog.

The other day my wife and I were cleaning out our crawlspace in our basement when we stumbled across a tote full of my old artwork and childhood papers. Submerged within this tote was all of the stories I had written as a kid; I'd say about 11 or 12 years old. When I wrote these stories, I was obsessed with the slasher horror movies and it showed in my writing.

Reading these awful stories today is like torture. And do you know what is even more torturous? The fact that I'm going to share it with you. Yes, you heard that right, I'm going to show you my earliest work. The following is the first page of my first ever novel. (I say novel even though the entire story is a whopping 12 pages long.) Here it is with zero corrections. Go ahead and have a laugh.

The story was titled, "Your History." The byline was, "This is one class that you'd better pass!"

Alright, alright. Stop laughing.

On a side note, "Your History" was so successful (in my mind) that I wrote a sequel called "Your History Part 2: School Days" And the tagline for that masterpiece was, "Time for a Long Vacation."

And now my first-ever first page of a novel (with a few comments from me in red.) Enjoy.

This is such a mistake.

It is time for the first day of school and Mr. Stean is organizing his notes. Marc Stean is a substitute teacher for Mrs. Judy Eagle's 10th grade History class. Marc is tall, (6'4"- 6'5"), muscular, and weighs approximately 200 lbs. He has black hair and black eyes. (Notice how the descriptions just flow out of my 11-year-old mind?) Marc is not a teacher who usually dresses up, he likes to wear casual clothes but today is very special so he has dressed up. Judy is in the hospital for nine weeks. She is on IV's and oxygen. (It's all in the details, folks.)

Marc leaves for school and says that he is ready for anything. When the day gets underway, kids snicker and laugh at him. The day is almost over and the kids are acting up. They don't listen to anything Marc says.

James, a red-head, spits a spit-wad into the back of Marc's hair. Jimmy put chewing gum on Mr. Stean's chair. John got into the gradebook and changed all the grades. (Did I really think that stuff happened in schools?)

That night, Marc decides to be more strict with the kids. Marc also thinks about all that has happened that day. This angers Marc, but he keeps his cool. He says to himself, "I never should have taken this job. My day has been a disaster and I'll go crazy before this grading period is over."

The next day is even worse. He thinks about the things that had happened. Anything bad that could happen, did. (OK, maybe I could use a little more description here.) This continues for five straight weeks, when the principal comes in and sees the kids messing around in the class.(Five weeks in five paragraphs. That, my friends, is called efficiency.) The principal fires Marc and says, "Don't ever come back if you can't keep your class under control." (Ohhhh.)

He goes home furious and looks at the pictures on the wall.(???) He loves to design and make-up ways of killing for movies. Marc just loves seeing blood and gross violence.

He has a wrist-band that he wears around the house. It is a band that slides onto his arm. It is about the length of his forearm. The blade is 12 1/2 inches long. The blade is razor sharp and can slice through bone and meat like it was butter. (See how the similes roll from my fingers like... uh... like... well, I can't think of anything right off-hand.) The blade slides out the band when he clinches a fist and backup when he releases. He puts this along with some clothes into a wooden floor in the cellar.

And there you have it--my first page as a budding writer at the “tender” age of eleven. The story progressed from this strong first page into slasher-style violence. I feel sorry for my grandma who typed every bloody word. I mentioned in another blog once that I wonder if she was secretly pushing my mom to have me committed and I still believe that could be the case. I'd love to give you more fun and entertainment but I must save the last 11 pages of this exquisite writing for my next submission to my publisher. Get ready, Rhemalda, to go into the "Your History" business.

I know they'll love it. Don't you think?